I remember reading a post in Benzo Buddies years ago that essentially said that, from a biological perspective, if you are still alive, there is more right with your body than there is wrong. This was an eye-opener for me! When we are dealing with extreme illness it can be easy to feel like everything is wrong with our bodies. We may even begin to hate ourselves.
Looking in the mirror while undergoing such extreme transformation can be painful. But just remember that’s exactly what this is- a transformation.
When the caterpillar begins its process of metamorphosis its body sees the new butterfly cells, called imaginal cells, as foreign and has an autoimmune response. This response creates a battle between the old caterpillar body and the dormant butterfly DNA that has awoken. At a certain point, this struggle leads to the caterpillar breaking down to nothing but goo.
But this same process of breakdown and battle with self-destruction is how the butterfly’s cells unite and become stronger and stronger until one day, it emerges as something completely new — something that once crawled but now is free to fly!
In our personal battles with self-loathing and physical breakdown, the butterfly can help us remember that while transformation is truly painful, it can lead to great beauty and freedom if we let it.
The first step in this process may be to stand in front of a mirror each day, acknowledge the pain, and then find 3 things that are going right with our bodies that we are thankful for. Say it aloud “Thank you body for…” or “Thank you, I love your …”. It may be difficult at first. We may not feel genuine in our gratitude. But change takes time and practice. Just remember, if you’re still breathing there really is more right with your body than there is wrong. So give yourself some credit!
Keep at it! Every time you see yourself in a mirror, transform your pain into love and gratitude and see what happens. For me, this was a HUGE step in my healing and transformation journey. 
Benzo Brains 
If you would like to join a community of people supporting each other in healing from medical harm here is the link to our facebook group https://www.facebook.com/groups/715900844300431/
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Thank you, this helped me. ALSO, may I ask for advice on suing the doctor? 53 months ago I contacted her requesting to stop benzos, asked did I need to taper? She me to quit cold told turkey (after taking as directed for 29 years). I’m now damaged with idiopathic small fiber peripheral polyneuropathy. I no longer have a cheerful personality. I’m just very “blah” and burning all the time.
Do you know any lawyers that do this successfully?
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hi i’m sorry benzoinfo.com may have a contact that can help you with a case but I don’t know of anyone at this time
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